Last Kiss Goodbye

I was sitting on the last chair, in this cold room. I've been waiting here all day long with a box of chocolates and a dozen flowers. This hospital seemed even darker every second that passed by. I've been here all day waiting for a response, an answer of how was he doing, 13 hours here waiting in this cold room. I came as soon as I received the news of his terrible car accident. His sake was my own and I was as concerned as I could possibly be.

"Excuse me, you can come in now." The pale white nurse almost awaking me from my sleep, said.

"Thanks." She guided me through the shiny hallway, to the room number 217, and then she left. I took the door handle, and took a deep breath, and then come in. He was laying on the bed, and I sat on the small chair right beside him. I laid the box on the table and arranged the flowers in a small cup. He was just laying there, sleeping. I grabbed his hand and kissed it, hoping he would notice I was there for him, always. He was my friend, I could have not let him alone, not today, not never.

Few seconds later, a different nurse, tall and brunette, came in, she arranged some things on the bed, left some pills on the table, changed the water in the IV, and made her way to the door.

"Wait." I said.
"Yes?"
"He will get better, right?"
"We're hoping he will." She answered. Not exactly the one answer I was hoping for.
"Oh, I understand. Thanks." That was all I could say.

You know how it felt, having your one friend, your one mate, your one love, laying on a bed, not knowing what may happen next? Just sitting there, completely useless.
I felt the door closing and I drank some water I bought earlier in the store, and then grabbed his hands once again.

"Hey you." He woke up.
"Hey! O my God. Are you okay? how are you feeling?"
He barely opened his eyes, and I stood up.
"I'm better now, you look beautiful." He said.
"And you are feeling really bad! Lay back."
I stood there for half a minute, and watched as he fought himself, not knowing what to do, not knowing where to go. he was just there, helpless. And I was there, useless.
"Want something?" I asked.
He ignored my question, so I took a deep breathe and controlled my feelings. I could see his pain, and I could almost feel it as mine. I was afraid. Afraid I had the possibility of losing him, afraid he would never know the real one and only reason of why I was standing here beside him, and the reason I could feel this.
"Come closer." He barely whispered. He could barely talk. I did, waiting for him to say something, and I sat on his bed.
"Closer" he whispered once again.

I laid on his chest and he wrapped his arms around me. The sweet scent of tobacco and perfume made me remember of the nights we kept awaken just talking and laughing. He reminded me of home, laying by his side, reminded me of home.

"I just missed your sweet vanilla smell." He said. And it was exactly the splash I always used, vanilla.

I made myself comfortable in his arms, and slowly closed my eyes. We just laid there, without talking, and barely breathing. I felt good. I felt, that was where I was belonging.

"How are you feeling?" I asked.
"Im dying" He said.
"No, youre not." I answered quickly, trying to think that was certainly not an option.
We just stayed still, and quiet.

"Actually..." He said. "I do want you to do something for me"

I opened my eyes, i listened carefully.

"Just ask for it" I said.

"Kiss me." He answered.

I stopped breathing for a second and my heart started pumping as fast as it could, when I catched my breath, my pulse felt quicklier than before, and suddenly i was closing my eyes, preparing for his kiss.

I watched him attentively while he run his fingers slowly, painfully, through my face, and he softly touched my lips. I slowly pulled myself closer, trying not to harm any part of his body. His lips. That sweet taste of his breath. The softness of how he grazed his lips with mine, and the perfect touch of his hands in my back, and the tenderness on the way he kissed me,made the moment exquisitly perfect. I pulled back,and I brushed his black hair back and ended the kiss. He touched my hair and knead my nose.

"I've been waiting five years for this moment." He said.
"I love you" He added.
Only those three words could make the moment better, so I hugged him.
"I know, I've been waiting three years, for you to tell me this." I said.
"Im afraid." He responded.
"Why?"
"That maybe it is a little too late." I stayed silence and turned back to my original position, I grabbed his hands, and kissed it.
"Its never too late. I love you too." I finally declared.
He brushed my hair for a short amount of time, and then I fall asleep in his arms.


I heared a sharp noise and woke up. I sat on the bed and looked to my left. Several nurses coming in the room and pushing me to the right corner of the room. When I finally cleared my eyes and watched the small screen. The long line representing his heartbeats, made me shed a tear.
"No!" I screamed and cried.
"Clear the area" One of the doctors said, followed by the sound of a charged defibrillator.
I just kept screaming, shouting and crying, praying somewhere in Heaven an angel was listening to my cries, and believing the doctors will make their best, and he will actually survive.
"Please no." I kept saying.

One of the blonde nurses took me in her hands and tried to take me out of the room, and as I crossed the door, while fighting with the nurse, begging she will keep me inside the room, I heard something I wish I would have never heard.
"Time of death, 9:17 pm". The sound of my cries grew louder every time. The nurse finally handled my state of emotion and pulled me out of the room, I leaned against the wall, and shout.
The tears were insatiable, and I felt a cold wind in my cheek. He left me with nothing. He left me with the lover's final breath. I was sure the cold wind was him, and that he was saying goodbye. He left me with nothing more, than his kiss, that passed and with time faded away, sweet last kiss goodbye.